As I was reading one of my favorite books under the title of
What the Dog Saw, by Malcom Gladwell, I came across a
paragraph that made me stop and think for a while. In that part of the book, as
Malcom discusses the story of Cesar Millan – a famous dog show host on the
National Geographic channel he writes:
“In every episode,
he arrives amid canine chaos and leaves behind peace. He is the teacher we all
had in grade school who could walk in to a classroom filled with rambunctious
kids and gets everyone to calm down and behave. But what did the teacher have?
If you’d ask us back then, we might have said that we behaved for Mr. Exley
because Mr. Exley had lots of rules and was really strict. But the truth is
that we behaved for Mr. DeBock as well, and he wasn’t strict at all. What we
really mean is that both of them had that indefinable thing called presence.”
Working in the field of education, and experiencing
scenarios like the one quoted above on daily basises makes me not help but
think, what exactly is that effect we call presence? And why do we feel it with
some people but not with others?
What is
it?
Presence is this amazing energy that reveals itself and
attracts people attention like a magnet attracts metal. It cannot be physically
seen, clearly defined or classified, yet it makes such a
huge difference when someone has it; we simply can feel it.
People who possess
strong presence attract everyone’s attention and are able to get a whole crowd to
listen, without having to speak. Presence is non-verbal, yet it can have a
stronger influence and deliver a more powerful message than spoken words.
Research in the field of communication reveals to us that up to 93% of
communication is non-verbal while the remaining 7% consist of the words we
speak. Non-verbal communication is always referred to as a combination of body
language, facial expressions and tone of voice. What you rarely hear though, is
that all of these aspects put together with the right type of energy form what
we know as presence.
Is it
something anyone can develop?
The big question then is: Can presence be developed or is it
something that you either have or don’t?
Although many people naturally have charismatic characters
and presence that is hard to go unnoticed, there is good news for those who
don’t: Presence is a skill that can be developed.
Oftentimes, presence is associated with presentation skills
as presenters need to capture their audiences and deliver their message as
flawless as possible. Anyone with the desire of developing their presence
skills must work on several areas in their life and make it a point not to miss
out on any of those areas. One can easily talk for days about each area, however, below is a brief preview:
· Self Confidence
I believe that the main issue that people with low self-esteem or little
self-confidence have is that they lack the acceptance and love of who they are. They
always put themselves in a position of comparison to others. The first step to
being self-confident is to accept yourself and like yourself for who you are
and not for who others expect you to be. You are meant to be an original masterpiece
of you, not a replica of others.
· Public Speaking
Believe it or not, public speaking ranks as the number one fear that most
people have. It even ranks higher than the fear of death. Developing one’s public
speech abilities is directly linked to self-confidence. Speaking to a small audience can be a start.
· Developing a field of positive energy
Everything around us consists of energy. As a matter of fact, we are made of a
field of energy with the manifestation of our bodies as the physical part of it. Energy matters
and it is contagious. The minute we start paying attention to the state of mood
we are in and the level of energy we are at, it becomes easier to control that
field and keep it at a positive note. It all starts with awareness.
· Believe in your message
If the messenger does not believe in his message, then neither will his
audience. A leader’s presence is always stronger when he or she believes in the
message they are delivering. You simply cannot have noticeable presence if you
do not believe in what you are communicating. People will only believe the message if they believe the messenger.
· Do it with passion
When asked about the secret to his phenomenal success, Yanni, the global
and perhaps most successful musician of our modern time answered: “Passion
is the fuel”. Believing in your message and principles is good but not
enough. What makes it excellent is being passionate about everything you do. Passion
keeps the flame within alive and adds more value to anything we do.
· Looks Matter
In
the business of leadership and influence, you must look the part in order for
your presence to be put in the right place. Despite the fact that many people
argue that the value of someone lies in who they are on the inside, looks
do matter. If a chairman or a leader of a business team shows up to a meeting
wearing shorts, a tank top and a pair of slippers, chances are that most people
will not feel his presence or take what he says seriously. The same is true
for a master chief showing up to teach his students cooking skills while
wearing a full tuxedo.
In conclusion, mastering your presence makes all the
difference in any area of your life, be it personal or business related. The
power of presence is not a gift limited to those who have it only; it is a
skill that can be developed through intentional actions and directed awareness.
Presence is one of the main keys to getting others to follow you and believe in
you for successful leadership cannot go without a strong presence of a leader.
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